So as a protective mechanism I`ve built this imaginary wall around myself.  I`ve done this to protect myself from more hurts, brick by brick.  Over the years I`ve built it up and it's "protected" me ever since.

Unfortunately doing this has not allowed the real me to shine through (whatever the real me is).  Why??  It`s because I`m scared of allowing the real me to be seen in case I`m hurt again.  If only all these hurts didn`t happen in the first place (Ha! not likely when you`re Asian or adopted).

I`ve tried to explain my situation to other people but they don`t understand me or how I feel.  No matter how hard I try the wall won`t come down.  I don`t think non-adoptees really understand the trauma and pain that adopted people go through (am I right in saying this?)

Until the day comes when my "wall" comes down, it will keep going up and up - PERFECT ISOLATION IN BEHIND MY WALL

Quote from Roger Waters lead singer from Pink Floyd.

I think I speak for all adoptees here, don`t you think?